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Sarah Palin….what the hell?

July 6, 2009

Okay, can somebody tell me what in the hell is going on? I have many questions that I feel must be answered.
Why did Sarah Palin resign her governorship? And I would like the REAL reason, please. Not some BS about how shes planning to do more good from OUTSIDE the government, or that she refuses to adhere to “politics as usual” and simply laze in the “lame duck” position she would have undoubtedly had to assume. I want the REAL, blood and guts reason. I know theres one. Here are some reasons that I would have no problem believing, considering what a crazy, hypocritical, religious, right wing extremist she is.
1. She has just had a lesbian affair that she is incredibly ashamed of, and she feels that she must vacate her position ASAP as either a sign of repentance, or a hope that if she bolts quickly enough, people will lose interest and simply forget. Not so, Mrs. Palin, not so. I mean, who could blame you for wanting to cheat on that couch potato of a man you call your husband? The forbidden lesbian romance does not seem too far fetched for me. Crazier shit has happened, believe me.
2. She is being blackmailed. Maybe someone else walked in on her lesbian affair and is giving her an ultimatum: resign or I go public with this shit. Plausible? I think so.
3. Corruption that goes soooo deep that even resigning her office puts her in a shallower hole. You know its bad when your only two options are either killing yourself politically, or savagely murdering yourself nationally. Either way, some peppy journalist better get his/her ass in there to find out what the hell she did. I’m thinkin it might take Woodward and Bernstein number two…or the second coming of the messiah. Either one. But make it quick…please?
4. Family crisis. Did you think Bristol was bad? So did I, but even that catastrophe didn’t make the bitch resign her office — she went as far as running for freakin VICE PRESIDENT in the throes of that debacle! I’m thinkin maybe the other daughter is preggers? Or the military son is gay? Or the hubby is screwing her sister? It’s something…and its juicy.

All I can say is…there is something behind this, and it is NOT PG. If the media continues to simply say, “we are confused,” or, “she said she was simply passing the ball,” were gettin nowhere. And I, personally, will not REST until the true reason sees daylight.

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