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The invasion of “Super”

July 4, 2010

It has been a slow invasion — but it has been persistent. And now, the take-over is nearly complete. It’s winning the war on vocabulary — and I’m scared (and annoyed) as all hell.

The word “super” has infiltrated conversations far and wide. It has killed off words like “really,” “very,” and “so.” Those words are long-gone. They never really stood a chance — did they?

I’ve noticed that the word “super” is now used by just about everyone in the English speaking world. What used to be a term that was used by only “Valley Girls” and those who were poking fun at the decline of modern language by those who reside in “The Valley,” is now used by just about everyone — and I was shocked and disturbed to realize (as I did yesterday) that even those who I view as highly intelligent, articulate and mature people place that word in their sentences and do not notice how unfitting it is.

For instance, when did it become okay and normal to say, “Gosh, I’m super, super tired, I gotta go to bed,” instead of, “Gosh, I’m really, really tired, I gotta go to bed?” Or, “I’m super sorry about that.” instead of “I’m so sorry about that?” Was there some memo I didn’t get? Was there a fax that was sent out to all of America that I missed?

As far as I’m concerned, the word “super” should only be used when one is describing the powers of a Superhero or people or things that fit into the category of “super”. On, the word, “super” is defined as: “an article of a superior quality, grade, size, etc.” Words like really, very and so are defined as: “In a high degree; extremely.” Those are not the same things!

First, the word “like” invaded and inserted itself into places in sentences where it didn’t belong. Then the word “Um” spontaneous combusted all over the place — and now “super” is blasting onto the scene. I’m not going to take this quietly.

Let me break this down for you so you can understand: I’m SUPER SUPER annoyed by all this. Where has the English language gone? What does “yo” mean? What, really, is a “dude”? What’s up? I don’t know … you tell me! I’m pretty sure the sky’s up there! And the damned price of gas! And my blood pressure gets further and further “up” every time I hear the word “super” used as an adverb!

Let the use of “super” be a sign of idiocy, and not a sign of literacy. Why can’t we go back to the days when the regular use of “super” was a sure sign that you either watched or were on the show “The Hills?”

Please. Like, I’m supes dupes oves this whole, like, super thing.

And please, don’t even get me started on the whole “fashizzle” crisis.

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